wispfox

I have no brain for things not work-related. But! I can offer beauty and silly and such, because it's fun and good and I want to. :)

( no really, lots of links under here. No actual content )

today's Queen of Wands has a good quote:

"[...] tell me something. Have you always known these people?"

"Well, no-"

"-and were they perfectly capable of surviving before you came along?"

"...yeah. They were. I see your point."

One of those 'yes, _exactly_' replies I get from time to time to posts of mine felt like something I should post. So, with permission, I am.

In reply to my life lessons write-up post, opalmirror said:

"For me, discovering all these things required I not be in a primary relationship, because a primary relationship implied a level of entwinement that made it impossible for me to sort out who I am, coupled with a level of stress about partner happiness that compromised my ability to find energy to work on understanding myself."

Uh, yeah. Most of those life lessons I posted? They were things I realized within the last couple years, mostly during the time I was very intentionally avoiding serious-type relationships. I truly don't know if I could have figured them out while in one, but I _do_ know it was _significantly_ easier to do without such an attachment to anyone. I needed that time, when the only person I was responsible was to myself (and my cat). As well, having that time made it much easier for me to know who I was outside of major interpersonal entanglements, and therefore figure out what I needed while _in_ them. (of course, the 'what I needed while in them' part was/is mostly theoretical. We shall see. ;)

Anyway. That comment felt like something I very much needed to post.

Someone I read is writing about poly life lessons, and it's starting to ping my brain to write something similar. Except I don't seem to be able to figure out life lessons that are specifically _poly_, in my head. Which is sorta confusing, really. Relationship-specific, yes. But poly? Hmm. Might be because being poly is so strongly part of who I am. (which is funny, considering how hard I tried to be monogamous, most of my life. Poorly, I might add.) (yes, I also _talk_ in parentheticals)

Let me see...

( In random order )

I say interesting things, sometimes.

"Not knowing about something _is_ knowing. Just not, perhaps, what you want to know."

"When you're exploring something new, how could you _possibly_ know what is to come? It's the exploring that matters, not the destination..."

"You deserve wonderful things. This does not mean that this specific thing is going to (or not going to!) happen."

"Fears that are named are at least possible to work through. Fears that are not can surprise you, and take you completely off-guard."


I'm completely without words, but you all should go read this, that shadesong wrote. It's resonating on _so_ many levels for me. *shiver*


clouds


Funky. I am very rarely nauseated. And yet, right now, I am. I hate this week. Can I have a new week, please?