wispfox

rowyn asks interesting questions about problematic tropes in fiction.

I have not enough brain to respond myself, but thought someone of you might be interested and/or have thoughts to share.

Things male tech colleagues have actually said.

Why don't we have something better than latex condoms?

Stock photographers need a lesson in saxophones - and probably other instruments!

lots of people have asked about my fuzzy slippers (mostly at arisia). the company that makes then is doing free shipping right now, http://www.incastreasures.com/products/alpaca-accessories/baby-alpaca-slippers.htm

so for those who are interested in those slippers (they appear to have improved on their design, actually), or many other types of alpaca fur items made by actual Peruvians, take a look!

Posted via m.livejournal.com.

The Glass Mountain and the Sensible Child.
Right People

I have thoughts percolating, but they don't want to come out clearly. So I share messy.

Things about it being easier to be angry at yourself than other people because it's easy to come up with excuses for why other people might be behaving poorly. And, at least theoretically, one _knows_ why one does what one does.

Mind, this is a pernicious and dangerous belief. It was _shockingly_ hard to realize and understand that my emotions and subconscious and physical state were all combining with what I was consciously thinking, in order to affect both my world view and my idea of what was ok. And that's just the start of a journey involving 'who does what when why and how'. It's not just about what one is thinking, or what one is feeling, or who one is or was or will be. We are the sum of our parts, not just individual parts. Being asked if I value emotional reasoning over intellectual reasoning is a false dichotomy; they intertwine!

Thinkings about Right People and how hard it was for me to believe that there really _were_ people who were not only better for me than those I had previously know, but who were - and are - actively _good_ for me. And I'm good for them. Small towns make this harder to realize, perhaps. Or, maybe it's not town size, but communication about who exists and what social groups and norms and such. One of the things I desperately wish I could tell my younger self is that, honest to goodness, there are people in my life now - lots of them, although many are not nearby - who are just... fabulous. None of this tolerating me, or not being actively unpleasant. People who want to be with me and spend time and chat and snuggle and just _be_ together. And who I similarly want to be with.

Thinkings about how hard these kinds of things are to understand when, like the separation between touch and sex and how they can, but don't have to, intertwine, our culture is _so sure_ that this is how things are and should be and must be.

I'm not very good at should be and must be, and I'm not very good at settling. So many times in my life, things got better purely because I just couldn't settle for the mediocre - and sometimes actively bad - that I had. And I so often wish that I could somehow install this in other people. Good is possible. Right is possible. Happy is possible. But you can't settle for close enough or you may never find it.

So. Thinkings. And sharings of links.

Very nicely said, Scalzi.

Doesn't go into the variables involved in visible vs invisible categories. Would probably make things too complicated to explain, really. Fantastic, though!

Underrated gifts

Because it's timely.

[edit: I agree with the post for obligatory gifts. I do not for the kinds of gifts which are simply because they made sense and not because of a specific time. This latter bit also includes the category of things purchased or made at a different time and kept until there was an obligatory gift giving time.]

Via moominmolly, Silly art - really, go take a look. :)

Via the_xtina, Free Range Kids at Salon.

Not that I have kids, but _yes_.

What's the best way to report car fuel-efficiency?, Cognitive Daily.

Can you think of more words for snow?