[sad, rant]

[wispfox]

Why must I lose friendships for things that did not happen? And, because of who I am and how I am, _would_ not happen, even should the friend in question not have been similarly trustworthy? I miss the friendship. I would have been perfectly _happy_ had it continued as the friendship that it was. I had not seriously considered any other possibilities due to lack of availability, regardless of the fears/expectations of said friend's significant other. But apparently having a close friendship with me is threatening for my friends' significant others, sometimes. At least that's not always true, I guess...

Why is it that being who I am seems to be so damn good at magnifying problems in the relationships of those with whom I spend a sufficient amount of time, all too frequently resulting in jealousy and/or the loss of said friendships? Sometimes I hate being a catalyst.

I don't like losing friendships. I never have. I like it even less when the reason is not within the friendship itself. The dislike increases yet more when I run into former friends with relative frequency, due to mutual social activities that I refuse to stop attending. Worse yet when I had a sufficiently strong bond with the former friend that I felt a need to remove the bond.

*sigh* I wish I coped _faster_, dammit!

[edit: tried to make things a little more clear]

Comments

[bridgetester.livejournal.com]

fear, rage and despair - fear of a future outside their control, rage in advance about the future, and despair because they already *knew* what they were afraid of was inevitable but were trying to convince the universe and themselves otherwise.

Hmmm... determinism in the worst way.

When you first told me about the situation, I thought the people involved were, say, 19 or 20, no relationship experience, totally sheltered.

Older people can be Innocent too. And some of the Youngest can be the wisest of all. *notes*

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Older people can be Innocent too. And some of the Youngest can be the wisest of all. *notes*

Yes. Indeed. But going by trends, the initial statement/belief made sense. :)

[bridgetester.livejournal.com]

Agreed

[australian-joe.livejournal.com]

determinism in the worst way

Creating the outcome they profess to dread! Acting as though they have no control and it's all fated - yet *still* behaving badly in order to try to "cheat fate" or something.

Makes my head spin. I can't follow any line of reasoning where this seems like a good idea.

And when you see full adults snubbing people and walking past them just like kids in the primary school playground... I dunno. They have surely made their own hell.

[bridgetester.livejournal.com]

And that still brings up Sartre's quote in my head: "Hell is other people."