[sad, rant]
Jul. 27th, 2004 02:29 pmWhy must I lose friendships for things that did not happen? And, because of who I am and how I am, _would_ not happen, even should the friend in question not have been similarly trustworthy? I miss the friendship. I would have been perfectly _happy_ had it continued as the friendship that it was. I had not seriously considered any other possibilities due to lack of availability, regardless of the fears/expectations of said friend's significant other. But apparently having a close friendship with me is threatening for my friends' significant others, sometimes. At least that's not always true, I guess...
Why is it that being who I am seems to be so damn good at magnifying problems in the relationships of those with whom I spend a sufficient amount of time, all too frequently resulting in jealousy and/or the loss of said friendships? Sometimes I hate being a catalyst.
I don't like losing friendships. I never have. I like it even less when the reason is not within the friendship itself. The dislike increases yet more when I run into former friends with relative frequency, due to mutual social activities that I refuse to stop attending. Worse yet when I had a sufficiently strong bond with the former friend that I felt a need to remove the bond.
*sigh* I wish I coped _faster_, dammit!
[edit: tried to make things a little more clear]
I'm sure its fast as it should be
Date: 2004-07-27 07:26 pm (UTC)Whatever part of my essence that isn't corrupted by darkness - It's working on sending good energy your way. I hope it helps with the mending.
Re: I'm sure its fast as it should be
Date: 2004-07-27 07:34 pm (UTC)Honestly, I'm not sure how I _would_ rush it. There isn't anything else I can do but wait for myself to adjust.
rational-typing-while-bathing-in-the-soul-fire girl
*laugh* I have no idea what this means, but I'm amused.
(y'know, I should probably ping you about visiting me soon - not this week, though)
Re: I'm sure its fast as it should be
Date: 2004-07-27 07:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2004-07-27 07:53 pm (UTC)I need to be able to communicate too much while going through emotional/mental/etc havoc - that's part of why I did such an excessive job on controlling my emotions as a kid.
So yeah. I can.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-27 07:55 pm (UTC)Re: I'm sure its fast as it should be
Date: 2004-07-27 08:17 pm (UTC)And yes, you should ping me to visit. The Soon part is the only problem. I think I'm free next post-Pennsic. >:-(
On the plus side, after Pennsic, I have all kinds of free time.
no subject
Date: 2004-07-27 08:19 pm (UTC)Um. No. Things that require quick physical action aren't my forte. :)
I can stay cool-headed, but I can't parse things quickly enough to have quick reactions to things.
As for post-Pennsic - how about you ping me when you get back?
Re: I'm sure its fast as it should be
Date: 2004-07-27 10:33 pm (UTC)And that, my friend, is no small feat
Date: 2004-07-28 03:38 am (UTC)Re: And that, my friend, is no small feat
Date: 2004-07-28 04:35 pm (UTC)Entire civilizations have risen and fallen without once ever, over the course of their whole history, both in times high and low, understanding the nature and meaning of my words.
That wouldn't have anything to do with, just perhaps, their existence before you were born?
Then again, sometimes it is just better not to understand what I'm talking about. More than one noble entity has broken the ship of his mind on the jagged rocks of my peculiar notions. Fairly warned, says I.
Avast! Rocks ahead, capt'n! They're lookin' mighty peculiar too. 'Ware them rocks!
Re: And that, my friend, is no small feat
Date: 2004-07-28 06:12 pm (UTC)Before I was born? Before?
Oh... ah, I see. You don't know about the whole how-I-was-forged-two-cycles-before-the-birth-of-time-itself thing about me. Totally understandable. People make that mistake all the time.
Re: And that, my friend, is no small feat
Date: 2004-07-28 06:25 pm (UTC)Paradoxical. Because nothing could be completed before time began, because it takes time to complete things.
Time and other silly dimensions
Date: 2004-07-28 07:09 pm (UTC)Re: Time and other silly dimensions
Date: 2004-07-28 07:16 pm (UTC)That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 07:56 pm (UTC)"I shall, under no circumstances, attempt to merge the essence of a llama and a duck. While this might seem like a great plan, it didn't work out so well last time..."
Wait, wait, no... that's not it. Ah, here it is - it was #242.
"I shall automatically befriend anyone who is the first to send me a link about 2 dimensional crabs moving through the midst of single sided objects."
Ipso facto, you are now on my friends list. Silly me; I thought that rule would never come into play.
Re: That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 08:10 pm (UTC)Duly friended back, although I'm often overly lax about reading others' journals. :)
So what's the rule about a link to Flatland (http://www.alcyone.com/max/lit/flatland/)?
Re: That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 08:30 pm (UTC)Duly friended back, although I'm often overly lax about reading others' journals. :)
S'okay. Happens to the best of us.
So what's the rule about a link to Flatland?
Well, there goes the rest of my day.
Re: That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 08:33 pm (UTC)Alright you two, find your own journals to spam! ;)
*amused by the fact that people randomly have long chats in her posts*
Re: That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 08:38 pm (UTC)Re: That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 09:04 pm (UTC)Yes, I know
Date: 2004-07-28 09:55 pm (UTC)Re: That's it... now you've done it
Date: 2004-07-28 08:55 pm (UTC)Besides, there were Clicky Links! ;P
no subject
Date: 2004-07-28 09:04 pm (UTC)I'm amused/pleased that people on my friends list are all getting to know each other!
Meh!
no subject
Date: 2004-07-28 09:11 pm (UTC)