![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wispfoxSome people, I get to know to a certain point, and then I stop. Some people, I don't ever get a sufficient interest level to get to know them. Some people, I seek out (with varying levels of how often or how much), and some people I'm good with just happening to run into them.
Sometimes, I can have sufficient interest in a person to seek them out, but then get to a point where it seems the balance point between time and energy is such that happening to run into them is the best point. Sometimes, people have to do a fair amount to get my attention, and they turn into a really good friend (or something). Sometimes, I'm fine with just knowing that people of niftiness exist, regardless of if I ever get a reasonable amount of time with them.
All of this sometimes makes me feel fickle. And yet. And yet, if I actually tried to find time for everyone I know in equal amounts, I wouldn't know anyone very well, and would burn myself out in fruitless ways. So, knowing this, why is it that I can still feel fickle for picking and choosing where my time and energy goes? I confuse me.
There are lots of people I think are nifty. There are lots of people who I would be happy getting to know better if time and happenstance allowed for it. There are far fewer people who I can read easily, or perhaps who can read me easily enough that my difficulty does not become a problem. And ease of reading someone appears to be a major factor in who I am close to and who I will seek out.
There are definitely times that I look at the widely spread-outedness of the people who I am strongly drawn to - regardless of whether or not this pull causes me to feel a need to interact with them frequently - and am glad they are widely spread, because I would probably have a harder time reminding myself that it's ok to see people infrequently, if they were nearer. And yet, it can also frustrate the hell out of me that so very many people are really far away from me. Distance, and lack thereof, do make a very big difference in interaction patterns, and there appears to be no way to tell if in a good or bad way. Some of the people I had a lot of interaction with when I first got to know them are people I feel closer to now that it's less frequent. Some of the people who are far away are people with whom I suspect a reduction of distance would be good, although certainly still an adjustment.
The idea of not having anything for which one is working in an entirely non-verbal space baffles the hell out of me. I can think of three things, off the top of my head, which are entirely non-verbal for me (math, energy work, touch of any sort).
Apparently yes, I do need a jacket. (Yes, I'm not in Boston. It couldn't find Andover. Where it's snowing. Not misty) I don't remember who linked to this.
I have no idea who linked to this, either, but University of Massachusetts researchers will announce today that they have discovered a strategy for immobilizing sperm and have reached an agreement with a Norwegian company to develop a male contraceptive pill.
Ok. Sleep now. Seriously.
Sometimes, I can have sufficient interest in a person to seek them out, but then get to a point where it seems the balance point between time and energy is such that happening to run into them is the best point. Sometimes, people have to do a fair amount to get my attention, and they turn into a really good friend (or something). Sometimes, I'm fine with just knowing that people of niftiness exist, regardless of if I ever get a reasonable amount of time with them.
All of this sometimes makes me feel fickle. And yet. And yet, if I actually tried to find time for everyone I know in equal amounts, I wouldn't know anyone very well, and would burn myself out in fruitless ways. So, knowing this, why is it that I can still feel fickle for picking and choosing where my time and energy goes? I confuse me.
There are lots of people I think are nifty. There are lots of people who I would be happy getting to know better if time and happenstance allowed for it. There are far fewer people who I can read easily, or perhaps who can read me easily enough that my difficulty does not become a problem. And ease of reading someone appears to be a major factor in who I am close to and who I will seek out.
There are definitely times that I look at the widely spread-outedness of the people who I am strongly drawn to - regardless of whether or not this pull causes me to feel a need to interact with them frequently - and am glad they are widely spread, because I would probably have a harder time reminding myself that it's ok to see people infrequently, if they were nearer. And yet, it can also frustrate the hell out of me that so very many people are really far away from me. Distance, and lack thereof, do make a very big difference in interaction patterns, and there appears to be no way to tell if in a good or bad way. Some of the people I had a lot of interaction with when I first got to know them are people I feel closer to now that it's less frequent. Some of the people who are far away are people with whom I suspect a reduction of distance would be good, although certainly still an adjustment.
The idea of not having anything for which one is working in an entirely non-verbal space baffles the hell out of me. I can think of three things, off the top of my head, which are entirely non-verbal for me (math, energy work, touch of any sort).
Apparently yes, I do need a jacket. (Yes, I'm not in Boston. It couldn't find Andover. Where it's snowing. Not misty) I don't remember who linked to this.
I have no idea who linked to this, either, but University of Massachusetts researchers will announce today that they have discovered a strategy for immobilizing sperm and have reached an agreement with a Norwegian company to develop a male contraceptive pill.
Ok. Sleep now. Seriously.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2005-02-07 10:44 pm (UTC)You win!
:)