[schmoop? I think?]

[wispfox]

I like that, even with the mopey bits relating to the fact that my apartment is _empty_ right now, I am completely confident in that he'll be _back_. (and, yes, I do have intent to visit there at some point - dude, I _already_ wanted to visit Australia! I just have more reason now. ;)

I like that I had time during which I had both lots and lots of words and lots and lots of non-verbal. (And knowing that my need to be highly verbal is _appreciated_ is wonderful)

I like that I didn't let myself not say (and I _said_ them, mostly, not wrote them!) things that needed to be said because it annoyed me that it was true, or because I was afraid. And the telling was always received well. (I'm sure the above comment about highly verbal appreciation was a factor here, too)

I like that I felt like I was listened to on as many levels as I tend to listen.

I like that I was willing to look into eyes for long periods of time without breaking eye contact. And I learned that apparently part of why my gaze can be disconcerting is that I don't move my eyes at _all_ unless I'm thinking about it (or something not what I'm looking at catches my eye).

I like that, even though I most certainly had moments of feeling like I was being too strange (and therefore enough to make people leave), there was an explicit statement that at no point was that a possible problem. And I _most_ certainly got stranger than most people see me (I don't usually let people see me when I'm being really unable to sleep/fae/not fully here). Weirding people out is _always_ a concern of mine.

Yes, I miss. Of course I do - two weeks is a lot of time, especially when one is attempting to do lots of stuff during it. But I _don't_ have the fear that normally comes with distance for me. At least for now, at least while the sense I got is strong and important/needed shared verbalizations are in my head, I'm not afraid. And it is good.

I love. I miss. And I'm not afraid.

Comments

[shadesong.livejournal.com]

I am completely confident in that he'll be _back_.

*Exactly* how I feel about volta.

[rosefox]

It's strange and wonderful to read this... because we love the same person in such similar and yet different ways, because we use the same words for such different feelings and relationships, because of all the things we both do and all the things we do so differently.

You are giving me a glimpse into what it might have been like for me and Joe if it had been easy. The sweet in that far outweighs anything that might think to be bitter. Thank you.

[intenselaura.livejournal.com]

I'm happy for you. For both of you.

[echospiralheart.livejournal.com]

Buffy Musical Good. :)

[intenselaura.livejournal.com]

Yes, indeed. I think I need to get the CD. I got it in my head to watch the episode again about two weeks ago, and the songs just won't leave me alone. It would useful to be able to play them, without having to put the video on.

[echospiralheart.livejournal.com]

I have an mp3 of the whole musical. I'd play it at work while I was working, and of course, someone would walk by just at the time that Dawn was screaming! :)

[intenselaura.livejournal.com]

*giggles*

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

*smile* Yeah, I know. :)

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

*got the CD today*

schmoop.

[bluepapercup]

I am really happy for you, both of you two, but for you a lot lot :)

Yay for getting what is needed, and for being understood.

[australian-joe.livejournal.com]

I think that counts as mild schmoop, yes.

Am still kinda low on words.

I won't say it was everything I was hoping for - while true, that is insufficient. It was *more*.

We continue to surprise ourselves and each other with what is outside/beyond/contrary to our experience/history/baggage - and with how *easy* it all is.

More when I'm home.

You (still) do everything right.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Am still kinda low on words.

Mwa-ha-ha! I steal your words!

with how *easy* it all is.

Yes. Yes, indeed. Very odd (but certainly in a _good_ way!).

You (still) do everything right.

Mmf. I don't know if I will _ever_ hear that without a twinge relating to 'but there's no way I always will!'. *shrug*

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

The sweet in that far outweighs anything that might think to be bitter. Thank you.

I'm very glad! You're welcome, although it feels very odd to be being thanked for something that I really don't feel like I particularly _did_.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Thanks, hon. :)

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

*laugh* Yes! Got the CD last night!

Re: schmoop.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

*smiles* Thanks. And indeed, with the yay! ;)

[rosefox]

Well, I'm thanking you for writing about it, which you're definitely doing. *)

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

True! Ok, I feel less weird now. :)

[australian-joe.livejournal.com]

So it's *you* who's been taking my words! Hah!

Easy: I dunno that I quite think it's *odd*, but unusual, yes.

I don't know if I will _ever_ hear that without a twinge relating to 'but there's no way I always will!'.

Huh. Yes, I can understand feeling it as an expectation. I shall think further on ways to rephrase that. Would it be enough to treat it like an ad for financial investments? ("... past performance is no prediction of future performance...")

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

So it's *you* who's been taking my words! Hah!

Maybe if I have more available I'll have less trouble finding them? ;) I'm stockpiling!

And... 'easy' _is_ odd to me. I'm sure I'll adjust, but for now, it's odd.

Would it be enough to treat it like an ad for financial investments?

*gigglefit* I don't know, but that would be _really_ entertaining. :)