[travel.Joe]

Ended up working from home today due to major exhaustion.

australian_joe just left.

I mope much now.

It's a _lot_ more difficult to see him go now than it was in July. Season, perhaps.


I'm probably going to have a weird combination of needing time to myself, since the last three weeks were pretty social (although the past week was much less so), and really needing to be with individuals with whom I am comfortable and with whom cuddling is a reasonable expectation. Partly because I normally need that in the winter (especially late Jan/all of Feb), but partly because I'm going to be intensely mopey/sad until I readjust.

Comfy people have tended to be much better about visiting me than in past experience, as well as about pinging me for hangings out, which is greatly appreciated. Especially since I tend to be _much_ less good about pinging people about cuddly visits, yet need it more strongly at the same damn time.


I tend to be decent at ignoring people leaving until about 1-2 hours before they leave. Then, I get very quiet, because... words aren't useful because it's not words that I miss when they are gone. I can still _get_ words when people are not nearby. Also quiet because I tend to be at a fairly unstable point emotionally when I know it's going to be a while, and I'm not very good with goodbyes.


Ok. Back to work and attempting to ignore intense sadness, since I really _do_ need to be working right now.


[edit: I find it fascinating that, so far, I regularly dream about visiting Australia the night before he leaves. Even though I have not been there and therefore have no useful frame of reference. So much so that I know it's wrong _in the damn dream_]

[travel.Joe]

Ended up working from home today due to major exhaustion.

australian_joe just left.

I mope much now.

It's a _lot_ more difficult to see him go now than it was in July. Season, perhaps.


I'm probably going to have a weird combination of needing time to myself, since the last three weeks were pretty social (although the past week was much less so), and really needing to be with individuals with whom I am comfortable and with whom cuddling is a reasonable expectation. Partly because I normally need that in the winter (especially late Jan/all of Feb), but partly because I'm going to be intensely mopey/sad until I readjust.

Comfy people have tended to be much better about visiting me than in past experience, as well as about pinging me for hangings out, which is greatly appreciated. Especially since I tend to be _much_ less good about pinging people about cuddly visits, yet need it more strongly at the same damn time.


I tend to be decent at ignoring people leaving until about 1-2 hours before they leave. Then, I get very quiet, because... words aren't useful because it's not words that I miss when they are gone. I can still _get_ words when people are not nearby. Also quiet because I tend to be at a fairly unstable point emotionally when I know it's going to be a while, and I'm not very good with goodbyes.


Ok. Back to work and attempting to ignore intense sadness, since I really _do_ need to be working right now.


[edit: I find it fascinating that, so far, I regularly dream about visiting Australia the night before he leaves. Even though I have not been there and therefore have no useful frame of reference. So much so that I know it's wrong _in the damn dream_]