[sad, rant]
Jul. 27th, 2004 02:29 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wispfoxWhy must I lose friendships for things that did not happen? And, because of who I am and how I am, _would_ not happen, even should the friend in question not have been similarly trustworthy? I miss the friendship. I would have been perfectly _happy_ had it continued as the friendship that it was. I had not seriously considered any other possibilities due to lack of availability, regardless of the fears/expectations of said friend's significant other. But apparently having a close friendship with me is threatening for my friends' significant others, sometimes. At least that's not always true, I guess...
Why is it that being who I am seems to be so damn good at magnifying problems in the relationships of those with whom I spend a sufficient amount of time, all too frequently resulting in jealousy and/or the loss of said friendships? Sometimes I hate being a catalyst.
I don't like losing friendships. I never have. I like it even less when the reason is not within the friendship itself. The dislike increases yet more when I run into former friends with relative frequency, due to mutual social activities that I refuse to stop attending. Worse yet when I had a sufficiently strong bond with the former friend that I felt a need to remove the bond.
*sigh* I wish I coped _faster_, dammit!
[edit: tried to make things a little more clear]
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Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-27 08:31 pm (UTC)I know I will, and I know it does. Doesn't make me any less impatient...
I don't know what I'd do if I did.
Nor do I. But the sentiment is appreciated, nonetheless.
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-27 09:59 pm (UTC)Does it ever? ;)
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-28 01:11 am (UTC)Just... it only helps if I didn't already understand it. And I already knew that coping would take time.
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-28 01:22 am (UTC)Unless you're different from me in that respect?
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-28 01:32 am (UTC)At least part of my impatience when there are things I don't understand that affect me (either inside or outside of my head) comes from not understanding it.
So, it helps with impatience in those cases to understand things, yes.
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-28 01:37 am (UTC)But then the impatience shifts to a different kind. As
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-28 01:49 am (UTC)Therein lies my inability to settle for things. But knowing what the problem is makes it easier for me to be patient about it, at least for a little while.
But then, I'm not solely an INFP, I'm an INFx - which may affect this. :)
(or am I trying to say I'm not solely an INFJ? I don't remember what you are...)
Re: coping
Date: 2004-07-28 01:51 am (UTC)I tend to be an INxP. with bits of
everything elsethe other functions, as per normal