Phone calls at 10pm are never good...

My dad called me at 10pm tonight. She's not responding to treatment. They don't think she'll last out the night.

WMBR was kind enough, on my way home from visiting a friend in Lowell, to play some nicely discordant music. Precisely what I needed.

But I don't own any discordant music. Anyone have any suggestions? It needs to be *music*, not just random noises. And it needs to be as discordant as possible while still being music.

Damn, if my roommate didn't pick the worst time to go to Asia.

I think I'm numb. Except that I'm way tense. And I was crying randomly a few minutes ago. I would really like to have something to beat on right about now.

I hurt. I know my dad, it being his mom, must hurt way more. But I hurt. And I can't do anything with it. I was biting my thumb in the car on the way home, because it was a far more tolerable and present pain. And because I needed to stay in touch enough to drive. Was a strange feeling. Worked, though.

If she does, in fact, not last out the night, they will be going to Wisconsin on Sunday, and staying until the funeral.

Oh, huh. That may mean I no longer have plans Sunday. I was to be visiting my parents. Who may be on their way to Wisconsin at that point.

I have no idea if I'm going to work tomorrow. I don't know if it'll be worse to be at home with no distractions, or to be at work where I may randomly start crying around my co-workers. I guess I'll decide in the morning.

I know my boss will be fine if I don't go; he already told me I could leave if I needed to when I first told him about my grandmother being in the hospital.

Yeah. I hurt. And I have no roommate to cry on or hug. Stupid Asia.

Phone calls at 10pm are never good...

My dad called me at 10pm tonight. She's not responding to treatment. They don't think she'll last out the night.

WMBR was kind enough, on my way home from visiting a friend in Lowell, to play some nicely discordant music. Precisely what I needed.

But I don't own any discordant music. Anyone have any suggestions? It needs to be *music*, not just random noises. And it needs to be as discordant as possible while still being music.

Damn, if my roommate didn't pick the worst time to go to Asia.

I think I'm numb. Except that I'm way tense. And I was crying randomly a few minutes ago. I would really like to have something to beat on right about now.

I hurt. I know my dad, it being his mom, must hurt way more. But I hurt. And I can't do anything with it. I was biting my thumb in the car on the way home, because it was a far more tolerable and present pain. And because I needed to stay in touch enough to drive. Was a strange feeling. Worked, though.

If she does, in fact, not last out the night, they will be going to Wisconsin on Sunday, and staying until the funeral.

Oh, huh. That may mean I no longer have plans Sunday. I was to be visiting my parents. Who may be on their way to Wisconsin at that point.

I have no idea if I'm going to work tomorrow. I don't know if it'll be worse to be at home with no distractions, or to be at work where I may randomly start crying around my co-workers. I guess I'll decide in the morning.

I know my boss will be fine if I don't go; he already told me I could leave if I needed to when I first told him about my grandmother being in the hospital.

Yeah. I hurt. And I have no roommate to cry on or hug. Stupid Asia.