wispfox

I've had to deal with people who either don't interest me (and who either don't understand or don't respond well to my letting them know that) or are unpleasant about expressing their own interest enough that I've gotten kind of wibbly about how I flirt.

Yes. Oh, very much, yes! I _totally_ have this problem. Less than I used to (perhaps because I'm getting better at hanging out with people who are more comfortable with themselves), but still true.

Part of the issue is, I'm sure, that I'm friendly with people unless given a reason not to - which is apparently confusing. I'm also cuddly once there is a certain comfort level with someone, unless I have reason to _not_ cuddle - which is also apparently confusing. And, I _like_ flirting for fun. So me flirting may or may not _mean_ anything. Perhaps another part of why I prefer to be verbal about it. (ok, probably if I'm flirting with someone, there's _some_ interest, but there may not be enough for me to actually want to act on it)

I don't want to encourage people, but I do, and I'm really bad about . . . messages, I guess. I'm not good at verbalizing it.

I'm not sure I understand what you're saying here?

I've had two cases in which someone thinking I was "interested" was not only wrong, but I had no idea the other person was even operating under that assumption, go so awry that they caused social problems for awhile. So I get weird.

Ah, wow. But, then, if you didn't know that they were thinking that, there's nothing you _could_ have done. No?