[bits of brain]

[wispfox]

Lots of affectionate touch, _gooood_. And apparently having ditched my earlier weirdness in terms of being willing to initiate affectionate touch, also good. Yes.

Although it's kinda interesting to note that sufficient affectionate touch appears to bring my libido back from hibernation!


It's really, really interesting for me to notice significant improvements in other people's happiness with life. I sometimes forget how strongly other people's happiness affects my ability to find them attractive. I've had multiple instances of spontaneously becoming aware of the attractiveness of a few of my friends in the past few weeks, due to an increase in the happiness levels of their lives. Yes, happiness - real, deep level happiness - will cause at least some level of attraction on my part. Frequently to my startlement. :) And I think it affects me more strongly if it's more than a brief instant of it; if it seems to reflect general life happiness and joy, it's much more potent than if it's simply a brief moment of it. (Both is also possible, mind)


Various people have, in the past few months, spontaneously kissed me on the head or cheek or similar. This simultaneously confuses me and pleases me. Pleased, I think, is because I take it as affectionate contact. Confuses, I think, is because I can never tell if things involving kissing of any sort (even blatantly non-mouth contact sorts) has any additional meaning behind them. I've tended to decide that if anyone ever intends such things to have more meaning, they will have to tell me, and generally taken such things as simply another form of affectionate contact. But it's been happening a _lot_ more often lately. So I am simultaneously perplexed and pleased, and go on with my life. :)


Sleep now. Good day. I am pleased with my day.

Comments

[woodwardiocom.livejournal.com]

Various people have, in the past few months, spontaneously kissed me on the head or cheek or similar. This simultaneously confuses me and pleases me.

-I have discovered, in recent months, that kissing someone's hand is often exactly the level of intimacy and fondness I want to communicate. More than a hug, less than a kiss somewhere in the face region. Poifect. (Plus, it makes me look all debonair and stuff.)

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Oddly...

I think I take the very few times that my hand has been kissed as _more_ than a kiss somewhere in the face region, but less than a mouth-to-mouth kiss.

Serious level of flirting is what hand kisses make me think of.

[woodwardiocom.livejournal.com]

-Well, if I should kiss your hand, now you know what I mean by it.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Indeed. :)

[regyt.livejournal.com]

Hint: When I kiss you on the cheek, it means affectionate contact and comfort and stuff like that. If I intended it to mean more, I'd say so.

I seem to allow for many levels of kissing in how I work. I find that I have a whole category of kissing friends, who I'll happily kiss hello and goodbye on the mouth, where it is still just a form of affectionate contact.

And, hurray, libido! Libido is good! (As a general principle. Not when it acts up and I should be getting work done instead. But, still. Libido!)

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

*grin* As I said, I'd decided when it first started happening that I would assume affectionate something or other unless people stated otherwise. :) So clarification not needed, although it's nice to have external confirmation of the accuracy of that suspicion.

happily kiss hello and goodbye on the mouth, where it is still just a form of affectionate contact.

That, I don't do. I find it strange enough that some family members (my mom and small children) do that; I completely don't understand it otherwise.

And yes. Libido is good. :)

[phaedra-lari.livejournal.com]

I love friendly affectionate kisses on cheek, forehead, head etc. I think I associate them with a particular kind of non-sexual physical affection that's hard to find in our culture as an adult, and so when I do get it I feel all warm and cared for in ways that recall the nicer side of my childhood :)

I totally understand what you mean about finding people who have a deep connection to happiness more attractice. I feel this way too, and also when I am happier in the deepest ways I can see a lot of difference in other people more often finding me attractive.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

when I do get it I feel all warm and cared for in ways that recall the nicer side of my childhood :)

See... cheek/top of head/forehead kisses never happened to me (outside of the context of someone I was dating and therefore didn't feel a need to question any hidden meanings) before fairly recently. Like... within the past two to three years. Thus my mild confusion, and the reason I decided to take it as affectionate contact unless people say otherwise.

Happiness: yes. Precisely.

[echospiralheart.livejournal.com]

I hate kissing people on the cheek or being kissed on the cheek. Drives me insane, in fact. However, kissing someone on the forehead always reminds me of the way a mother kisses her child's forehead ... deep deep affection that is meant to be comforting ... sooo not romantic.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Drives me insane, in fact.

Huh. Any idea why?

mother kisses her child's forehead

I don't think my mother did this; perhaps why it confused me the first time it happened.

[echospiralheart.livejournal.com]

no. Not sure why. I just don't like being kissed on the cheek. I don't know if my mom ever kissed me on the forehead. That's just the image that always comes to mind though.

[nex0s.livejournal.com]

i interpret cheek kisses as non-romantic. i give my friends cheek kisses. that's not butt cheek kisses though -- those are Different :P

n.

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

*laugh* Yes, butt cheeks would be different!

But, noted. Is nice to have y'all externally validating my decision on taking it as simply affectionate touch. ;)

[wolfkitn.livejournal.com]

just for curiosity, a -totally- different take on this (and the sinus) discussion... note that i may be -way- off here, and if so please disregard. :)

have you ever had your thyroid hormone level tested? it's become a personal bandwagon for me (ever since i was diagnosed last year, that is), that when people (especially young women) mention some of the symptoms on the list of hypo or hyperthyroid symptoms, i suggest this. the two that pinged me were "sinus issues" and "lack of libido." others to watch out for might include depression or a feeling of malaise; dry skin; hair loss/thinning; eyebrows thinning at the outer corners; weight gain with no real reason for it, or the inability to lose weight despite dieting/exercise; feeling cold in reasonably temperate rooms; and various gastro issues (don't want to be guilty of TMI here :) ).

check out this site (http://thyroid.about.com/cs/hypothyroidism/a/checklist.htm) for more info on hypothyroid (*) symptoms if any of this sounds like it could be you. ( (*) note that there is also *hyper*thyroid, i.e. the thyroid is too active.)

one thing to note is that recently the board who controls these things (the "American Association of Clinical Endocrinologists" to be exact) tightened up what is considered "normal" for the basic thyroid level test (TSH, or thyroid stimulating hormone; if it's too high, your thyroid is underactive; too low, it's overactive). not all PCPs know this, but the about.com articles explain this more. a point or two on the TSH level can make a *big* difference in how a person feels.

okay, i'll stop now. :)

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Thyroid hormone level: not sure; probably, though. Not recently, however.

libido: tends to go away if my body decides nothing is likely to happen anytime soon (masturbation doesn't count, really, because it's not... what I crave). This almost certainly contributes to why getting enough touch would affect it. It also tends to go away in the wintertime, as the season starts affecting me. That,

depression: I have (wintertime) seasonal depression, and that is the only time I've had (otherwise) unexplainable depression.

dry skin: only when it's dry out because of the season being cooler and people having heat on all the time

feeling cold: yeah, my entire life. But I live in a cold location, and am not a particularly large or well-padded person.

Sinuses: The mild amount of sniffles has been true most, if not all, of my life.


So, overall, no. I don't think it's likely to be a thyroid problem.

Thank you, though, for suggesting it, as it's not something I'd have thought of.

[jirikido.livejournal.com]

purrrrrrrrrrrrrr, yeah, touch. i have to admit it took me way too long to figure out that this was missing from my life. i'm glad you're in that headspace too. be well.

[bridgetester.livejournal.com]

touch good