(no subject)

[wispfox]

A very nice LJ metaphor pointed out to me by ladytabitha, written by magpiegeese.

As I commented, although probably not word-for-word because I rarely do _anything_ word-for-word, the most common reason for me to drop someone from my friends list is because their journal is painful for me too read. Too much pain, not enough joy. A mix is good - a mix makes people more real - but if they are always down, especially if they never seem to _do_ anything to change things, I cannot handle reading them. Doesn't matter if I know the person offline or not, although I will feel a little worse about dropping someone I know offline as apposed to someone I only know online.

(The other most common reason would be how interesting I find their writing as compared to how often they post. I'm not entirely sure I'd keep myself on my friends list, were I not me - I post a lot, and I'm not sure how much of that is particularly interesting to anyone not in my head. *shrug*)

Comments

My Comment on a Similar Issue

[bridgetester.livejournal.com]

Although it's a thought-provoking topic, I can't/am unwilling to handle reading the diary of someone suicidal. It touches on issues in my past and those of friends. [...] In other words, it's too depressing [...]

I am interested in a discussion on why it interests [another lj user] and other people though. It's not that I'm afraid of death per se, although I am at points, but it's watching someone else's emotional descent... *shuddertwitchhide* I want to comfort the person writing that diary... and that's literally not possible.

Re: My Comment on a Similar Issue

[moonfall.livejournal.com]

maybe, in a weird way, it doesn't bother me so much because i've pulled myself out of there. i was terrified that these letters would take me back there...that i would empathize too much and it would be some kind of trigger for my depressions...

but it hasn't. some do make me very sad for them...thinking what a waste...which i think is actually good for me to see objectively. some piss me off, the young kids and how their parents should be beaten enthusiastically. some make me laugh, though, and i know it's weird but it's true. i think it's that you expect someone to say some of the things you read...but some of them are so surprising or so hard to read that the misunderstandings make you laugh.

the post linked in here was amazing! i LOVED the anti-therapist part. that's often the reason i drop people off my list...i can't stand bitching and whining without an attempt to make things better. if someone is trying i'll hold their hand all the way, but it drives me nuts when they complain about the things they DO have control over.

Re: My Comment on a Similar Issue

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

i can't stand bitching and whining without an attempt to make things better.

Yes. Although I _will_ note that, in person, I'm likely to rant about things which are affecting me over which I have no control. Aside from ranting, though - and even that has to be intersperced with _not_ ranting - I agree.

Re: My Comment on a Similar Issue

[moonfall.livejournal.com]

oh, sure! you gotta blow off steam sometimes! however, i recently cut someone from my list who really only seemed to post when pissed off at someone. this went on for months. i just kept thinking that there must be SOME other way to go about things.

Re: My Comment on a Similar Issue

[wispfox.livejournal.com]

Can't help you with the why it would interest someone else to read, since I wouldn't want to, either. _Maybe_ if I knew and was close to them, but in that case I'd want to be doing in-person listening, not online listening.