(no subject)
Jul. 20th, 2004 02:31 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
wispfoxI'm feeling oddly... detached today. Not so much in a bad way, but it feels a lot like every little bit of connection everyone and anyone gives me is a small gift, to be treasured and to be taken care of. Valued.
I don't think I have any controlling emotion today, either. Joy, sorrow, beauty, desire, acceptance, hope, need, fear, anger - they are all mixed up in a swirly, sparkly, deeply dark, liquid, multi-colored, multi-flavored blend. And even if I wanted to try to separate them out and figure out why they are each there (which I don't), I'm not sure I could. They feel like they need one another in order to exist, and would all fall to bits of light and dark if I tried to unravel them. And like I might go with them.
And yet, I also want to cry. But I don't know who I would be crying for. Or even if it's because of sadness.
(a small part of me, in the back of my mind, is wondering if there is another 'hi! take a break from your body, dammit!' episode coming soon. And if there is anything I can do to make the transition states less difficult)
I don't think I have any controlling emotion today, either. Joy, sorrow, beauty, desire, acceptance, hope, need, fear, anger - they are all mixed up in a swirly, sparkly, deeply dark, liquid, multi-colored, multi-flavored blend. And even if I wanted to try to separate them out and figure out why they are each there (which I don't), I'm not sure I could. They feel like they need one another in order to exist, and would all fall to bits of light and dark if I tried to unravel them. And like I might go with them.
And yet, I also want to cry. But I don't know who I would be crying for. Or even if it's because of sadness.
(a small part of me, in the back of my mind, is wondering if there is another 'hi! take a break from your body, dammit!' episode coming soon. And if there is anything I can do to make the transition states less difficult)
