[brains, social.relationships]

[wispfox]

(posting because I want it in writing for later reference, since I only just managed to put words around it)

I have trouble with being grouped socially if it's not obvious that there is awareness of the uniqueness of the individuals being grouped. Interpersonal examples of this include not seeming to care which person within said group one talks to or spends time with.

I kinda wonder if this relates at all to why I really don't like being a part of groups which are formed solely on a single attribute. (I tend to hang out on fringes of social groups in general, so I doubt it's the entire reason)

[edit: because you people want an example.

Something like an unexpected phone call, with the caller stating a lack of caring as to which of the residents they talk to. No matter who the caller is, or why they called, that'll make me immediately not want to talk to them.]

Comments

[psongster.livejournal.com]

I think what turns me off there is the generic nature of the neediness. "I want to talk with someone and I don't care who, but you will do."

On the other hand, I've sometimes called a household with different specific things I want to talk about with each person, but not caring about the order, and on a superficial analysis that could create the same effect.

And Randy and I do have some mutual friends who sometimes call to talk with whomever answers the phone, in a way that feels quite right and appropriate.